it's all happening

i am struggling right now, there is a war in my mind about the things that are truly important in life. one day light is shed on how important this "one" thing is and the next day that "thing" is gone and it's another "thing". they never are important. i just can't make my mind up about who i am or who i want to be. i feel like each day i am just playing another version of myself, it doesn't show so much on the outside more than it does in my own mind, my own train of thought. some days i feel like i have multiple personalities! yes, yes i am crazy. somedays i am oh so smart and know exactly what i want in life, i know where i am going and how i am going to get there. than one day it hits me that i have no idea. all i know is life is happening. it is moving on and leaving me so far behind, because it isn't just today i am wasting it was yesterday, last week, last month, last year. i wonder if people are just as lost as me, or if i am the only one so lost in my own mind that the real world sometimes means nothing to me. i get so swept up in my own head, with different versions of my life. i get so swept up in a constant state of worry that i can't enjoy my life. and i don't see this changing until i feel happy with myself, my life, my choices, where i am.